After the date

Well you read the Before the date now you’re reading what happened after the date along with now.

So I said that I was nervous. I was scared nervous. I can’t understand how I even got through with it. If my friend Liz wasn’t there I wouldn’t have been able to breathe. Ariel was a big help being there as well. I’m sure you want me to go into detail what happened but it was just a bunch of awkward not talking and nerves.

My first reaction to anything is to overthink what happened. The next day I had a two hour drive to do which meant more thinking, phone calls with family and a two hour game to video.

So during the game my coworkers/friends kept asking me about him. All I remember during the hockey game is I asked him to be my friend on Facebook. Then after the game and several reminders, I wrote to him apologizing for the nervous and awkward side of me and hoped to at least have future hang outs. I put myself out there, which isn’t something I normally do.

He read it because Facebook lets you know when that happens and at first I waited patiently for him to reply. Patience went to impatient, then to realization I’m getting ignored, to I give up. Wednesday and no reply meant nothing was happening. Nevora told me to move on Monday. Amanda told me to just give time but Wednesday even she was a little fed up. Liz same thing on Wednesday, she even told me that because I was so nervous that it showed I wasn’t interested, not something I wanted to happen but I couldn’t help the nerves. I muted the conversation, I wasn’t expecting a reply any time soon so I just didn’t want to get my hopes up anymore.

Thursday. Thanksgiving. I actually forgot about it except with my cousin who drove me to my aunts that day asked if he wrote to me. That was around 12ish. I didn’t check my phone knowing the answer would be no. My aunt asked me about it, I just said nothing’s going to happen, so I gave up. She told me to get the conversation up so I could show her what I said. I opened it and saw “J sent a sticker” (I’m not using his name). After seeing that I squawked or squeaked, either way a noise came out like a strangled sound. My aunt gave me a smirk and said that’s from him right? I went red. He said Happy Thanksgiving in caps with lots of exclamation marks after it and a sticker of a turkey. My mom FaceTimed me after this. I talked to him for 2 hours before we both had to stop, he went to go play games with his family and I was about to have supper. My smile never left my face. We continued talking that night.

We talked the next day before I headed back to go film a game. We talked Saturday. Sunday we talked that night for four and a half hours. Amanda told me she asked her boyfriend what it meant if a guy talked to a girl for four and half hours, he said oh that means a guy likes her.

Do I know the actual answer to this? Possibly. I’m not exactly allowed to say, he could read this. He could see my giving up moment. He could see that I was scared and I didn’t know what else to do. I still am nervous, but it’s more of an excitement because this could be something big or it may be something that just has us turn into friends. I’m willing to find out what this truly will be.

Before the date

This post was made before now, it was made for the weekend of November 20-22. It was before the date. The nerves.

November 1, 2013 I posted a blog called “Dear Future Husband”

At the time, I was just talking. I had no purpose for it. I don’t really remember what was going on in my life, I was a last semester senior in college, still trying to figure out what I wanted in life. Now I’m 24, working two jobs, one as a Production Assistant/Videographer and as Behavior Analyst Technician (BAT). Did I ever imagine myself in this position? No, but life throws curveballs and I just happen to really love my Production Assistant job, being able to go to any college games for free, but as a videographer, that’s just awesome.

In all honesty, I started off this blog more thinking about the upcoming date I have on Saturday. Okay it’s not a date date. It’s a group date. We both know that each other are interested to find out more about one another. I’ve been going 3 weeks trying to figure out what has been going on in his head that I’ve driven myself insane. Last week, I had to stop thinking about it which I did a really good job about it until friends/family start asking me questions. Basically, I told all of my friends about this, when I found out that it’s a possibility. They’re all super happy. My roommate did my hair and make up, which looked fantastic, when she found out about it. 

One of the favorite shots, it’s the genuine smile of mine. Caught in a laugh, eyes closed.

Again this group date has just made me all jittery, butterflies flying in my stomach, so nervous that I don’t know what to do and beyond excited. The picture may involve makeup and my hair being done but what I really need to do is just be myself. I keep thinking if I do myself up like this, this guy won’t see the true me. So maybe wearing a sweater, jeans and either boots, Sperry’s or a pair of Nike’s will be what I’m wearing. I don’t know all I know is that it’s better for me to just be myself and not who others portray me as.

I found out yesterday, the guy is excited about it. Like I said 3 weeks of not knowing what he’s thinking and I now know he’s excited, gave me hope that I’m not the only one who is excited besides the friends who will be there to witness this group date. Which we’re going bowling, I am amazing at bowling when it’s on the Wii, real life bowling, oh wow. There may be a reason why I haven’t played since high school.